Nothing going on

The Germans have really made the most memorable gay characters in their soaps. I mean, who doesn't love Chrolli, Joscka, DeRo och Cenny? But what are they doing right now? I really don't understand. In the years 2007-2010-ish, there were six regular gay(ish) characters in German soaps. There were Olli and Christian in Verbotene Liebe, Lenny and Carsten in Gute Zeiten, Schlechte Zeiten and there were Roman and Deniz in Alles Was Zählt. How many are there now? None!

Igor Dolgatschew as Deniz Öztürk.

Ok, that was kind of a lie. There har three bisexual characters. Deniz is still a part of Alles Was Zählt, but since Roman died he has just dated women. And not very nice women either. Please Deniz, step back outside of the wardrobe! Or at least have some juicy dreams about Roman!

Mickey Hardt as Dr. Jo Helmke.

And when Verbotene Liebe stopped being an every day soap (or at least an every second day soap) and became a once a week soap, Oliver Sabel left the series as well. I don't know if he did it by free choice or if the writers wanted something else of the show, but I do know that Olli was a very very popular character so they shouldn't have wanted for him to go. But Olli was never really interesting enough without Christian... But, he had a fling with Dr. Jo Helmke, and Jo is still a regular on the show But I haven't really watched the show since Christian left and Dr. Jo Helmke is not a favourite character in any way. I don't even think it's possible to follow his storyline on youtube. And that says enough!

Timothy Boldt who plays Ringo Beckmann.

And of course, there's Ringo Beckmann in Unter Uns. I do love Ringo, and Timothy Boldt hos plays him in the show Unter Uns, but it seems like the character is just part of really boring storylines. Storylines with no male love interests, that is. He dated Yannick and then he wanted to date Aaron (even though I guess he never admitted that to himself) and then there has just been girls. So I don love Ringo but I don't love Unter Uns. I think it's a boring series. It's a shame, because it could have been really interesting with Ringo being a villain and all. But Hollyoaks are good at that. Maybe they could borrow him?

Ship names

There's a phenomenon called ship names. Of course, they are the combined names of OTP's, like Johnlock (John and Serlock from Sherlock), Brangelina (Brad and Angelina) and Matlingsworth (Maya Matlin and Miles Hollingsworth from Degrassi). The last couple I certainly do not ship, but you know all about that... There are some really good shipnames amongst the fictional gays. Some of the just makes perfectly sense.

Larias.

Larias (Lari and Elias from Salatut Elämät), Fervid (Fer and David from Física o Química) and Chrolli (Christian and Olli from Verbotene Liebe) are some really good examples. And it is very easy to be together with John Paul in Hollyoaks, because his lastname is McQueen, and everything works with a Mc; McHay, McCarter, MacDean, it just makes sense!

Cenny.

Some of the are not that great, but they work. Cenny (Carsten and Lenny from Gute Zeiten, Schlechte Zeiten), DeRo (Deniz and Roman from Alles Was Zählt) and WilSon (Will and Sonny from Days of our lives) are examples. I mean, Wilson is a real name. The current actor who plays Will actually has that as a surname, Guy Wilson. And he plays Will! You could get confused by less.

Aarson.

But. There really are som ship names that are horrible! Aarson is one. Aaron references to Aaron and Jackson in Emmerdale. And Aarson really sounds like an ass' son. Don't like it. And today I got to know that the official ship name of Lari and Kalle of Salatut Elämät is Lalle. Lalle?! That sounds rediculous. At least in my Swedish ears. But they couldn't be called Kari, because Kari is the homophobic relative of Elias That certainly wouldn't do. So I guess we're stuck with Lalle. But I for one would prefer Laitänen och Väänela instead. But I don't get to choose so... And they are not that perfect either... Is there some correlation between bad ship names and failed relationships you think?

Violence in our minds

Ok, there is something with soap operas, violence and gay relationships. Straight relationships to I guess, but there is a significance in gay once, I think. The classical scenario is that a gay character is so deep into the closet that he can't handle the fact that he is attracted to another man that he uses violence to suppress both his and the other gay characters feelings. There are lots of examples of that.

Amy interrupts a tense moment between Brendan and Ste.

The most obvious example of this is the relationship/non-relationship between Ste Hay (Kieron Richardson) and Brendan Brady (Emmett J. Scanlan). This seems to be the first example of domestic violence in a gay relationship in a british soap opera. The actors stated that they were very proud of the storyline, and I do think that it is avery important matter to portrait. In the beginning of the Stendan journey, Brendan handled it by smacking Ste up about every second time they got together. Ste tried to stop loving Brendan and borke it off with him several times, but always ended up in Brendans arms in the end. In time, Brendan did start to handle his aggression and dealt with it and stopped smacking Ste up, and they started an sort of equal relationship, but even then he smacked Ste when he was haunted and pressured, a couple of times. Ste of course forgave him. Again and again. And Stendan is a very very popular couple. Even though their relationship was dashed by a little violence.

Ringo beating Yannick almost to death,

Another homophobic character very deep down into the closet is Ringo Beckmann  (Timothy Boldt) from Unter Uns. His self-disgust knew no bounds when he almost hit his fling Yannick Benhöfer (Eric Stehfest) almost to death, just because he wanted to have a proper relationship with him. Ringo on the other hand, repented of course, and tried to get Yannick back. But thankfully, Yannick never forgave him andleft the series just some episodes after the abuse. It would have been to unreal if he would have forgiven him, I think.

Lenny and Carsten beating eachother up before some snogging.

Well, another storyline with a lining of violence is the Cenny one. Carsten Reimann (Felix Isenbügel) and Lenny Cöster (Alexander Becht) liked beating both eachother and others up. When they were not fighting with other gangs, they were trying to resist eachother and did that with som beatings. In the end, Lenny even participated in an assault of Carsten, where they actually both were so damaged they ended up in hospital. Lenny, of course, changed his mind in the last moment and tried to stop the gang from beating Carsten up. Carsten had a hard time forgiving Lenny, but because he loved him so much, he finally did. And they live happily ever after.

Deniz and Roman forgot it all.

There are some similarities between the Cenny and the DeRo storylines. Just as Lenny knew that the gang was going to beat up Carsten, Deniz Öztürk (Igor Dolgatschev) knew that his hockey team mates was going to beat up Roman Wild (Dennis Grabosch). The homophobic hockeyplayers told Deniz about their plans, and even wanted Deniz to participate in them, and Deniz never really tried to stop them. He was a coward. He was running after them, but then he chickened out and ran away. The homphobes broke Romans knee and almost ruined his figure skating career. At first Roman knew nothing about Deniz's part in the assault, but when he knew, he never really had a hard time forgiving him. But, I read in an article that the actor, Dennis Grabosch, said that he never would have forgiven such a thing. But, I have to say, thank you writers for Roman forgiving Deniz, otherwise, we would have missed out on one of the most beautiful love storys of this century.

Joscha is not happy with Kai.

Alles was Zählt have given us another great love story where there was a bit of violence. Joscha Degen (Carlo Degen) was closetered football player that even got married to a woman to hide his homosexuality. But when he met the hot doctor Kai Seebach (Alexander Gier) on his wedding night, there was no turning back. But when they shared a cozy moment in the bushes, and Joschas team mates showed up, he reacted irrationally and pushed Kai into the bushes. Thank gods that Deniz showed up and talked some sence to Roman by telling him not to be such a pusch over and not letting others pay for his assholeness, and Joscha apologized to Kai. Kai in his hand, ended the thing between them, because of how Joscha treated him. A perfectly logical reaction. But of course, he couldn't resist Joscha and eventually gave in. And they lives happily ever after.

Larias. Not always friends.

Craig and John Paul.

There have also been some smacking and pushing between Larias and McDean. That is Lari Väänänän (Ronny Roslöf) and Elias Vikstedt (Petteri Paavola) and John Paul McQueen (James Sutton) and Craig Dean (Guy Burnet). In both cases passion won against anger and the couples were united. And this made me start thinking. I am not saying that these kind of stereotypichal scenarios are just in gay relationships. I am fully aware of that abuse are present in straight relationships in soaps to, even though I think it is more common that there is more common with a little bit of violence in the beginning af relationships between men, in the denial state. Maybe it's about testosteone and male stereotypes. Violence is present in both same sex and straight relationships in both soaps and real life, and people stay with their partners after abuse in real life to. And it is important to show this in soap operas to bring awareness of violence and help people deal with it, and maybe even seek help. Hollyoaks is actually very good at directing to help lines when showing these storylines. But, because of the ordinariness of at least a little bit of violence in gay relationships in soap operas there is some kind of message that it's ok with a little bit of violence. Expect a little bit of abuse, but after that everything is fine. But I get that it has to some drama to the storylines, and even I have confessed that a lot of my favourite storylines actually have som violence in them (see above), but it really would be nice to see a nice helathy gay relationship with no violence, no infidelity and no fucking brain tumour, or shooting maniac, or a collapsing building, or strange deadly virus, just happiness, love and lots of snogging. Would that be too uninteresting to watch?

Again...

Carsten Reimann and Lenny Cöster.

I have to confess. I am watching Cenny again. Lenny and Carsten that is. It all happened because I was scrolling down my blog post because I was searching for something and happened to scroll past the special post about the pair I made in april, because I was already rewatching the storyline three months after descovering it. And now I am hooked again. There is just something very addictive with the love story of Lenny Cöster and Carsten Reimann. Though I discovered that one of my sources of the storyline was removed and annoyed. But then I found another one, a source that contained an episode previously missing, that I really really wanted to see! But I won't tell you my sources in case of RTL spying on me. If you want to know my sources, if you are curious on any storyline, please send me an e-mail. I am gladly part of the contribution av these storylines, to as many people as possible!

Alexander Becht and Felix Isenbügel.

The actors Alexander Becht and Felix Isenbügel both left the series Gute Zeiten, Schlechte Zeiten in 2010. They have done a bit of everything since then and as I have told you before, Felix Isenbügel who plays Carsten, has told RTL that he could imagine returning to GZSZ, but there are no such hints from Alexander Becht. There is an interview with him on youtube that I barely understand a word from (Germans and their fast-talking) but I read that he said that he didn't like the part of of Lenny, he was sick about the storylines and that he was tired of the 16 hours working days. I do understand. I guess it is really hectic being a soap actor, and I do even understand he didn't like the character of Lenny. Lenny was quite blank character hos solved everything with a little bt of violence. But I think he became a really nice and interesting character when he came out and started dating Carsten, who actually also used to be quite blank character. The two characters supplemented eachother. I do follow both Alexander Becht and Felix Isenbügel on facebook, and at least Felix seem to be an active actor, mostly on stage.

Carsten, the long-haired Lenny and the kiss.

Well, I don't know, maybe Alexander Becht has a lot on, but if he doesn't why not coming back to GZSZ for a bit? I really think the series needs a new gay storyline, even though there is an ongoing female one, but the more the merrier. And I for one would really like to see what Lenny and Carsten does today! What happened to Lennys art studying? How did he adapt to a new life outside prison? Did they go to Barcelona or Australia? Does Carsten still have such a sleasy taste in clothes (tight jeans and a tucked in shirt is never good)? I mean, there are endless questions and we doesn't get any answers. You really got a responsibility here! That is the backside of giving us a gay storyline with a happy ending. We are never really satisfied. And with "we", I mean me.

OTP

I have realized what OTP means. It's does not mean One True Pairing that you would think, it means Oh The Pain. Because all the couples I have as OTP's gives me lot of pain. If they are not splitted up by death (Fervid, DeRo), divorse/separation (Chrolli, McDean), jail (Stendan) they leave to soon (Cenny, Joschka, Chryed, Kish). And all they leave behind is Oh The Pain! Awful. Utterly awful.

Favourite fanvids ep.3

It's been a while since I shared some of my favourite fanvids. We must do something about that I think. I actually love fanvids! I can sit for hours just watching all sorts of fanvids, even though gay themes are the favourites. Today I have to share a new favourite. I have so fallen in love with Stendan! Ste and Brendan from Hollyoaks that is. I know that it's a brutal love story, but I love it anyway. I so hope that also they will get a sunset ending in the end.

This is a couple I loved even before I started watching it by watching fanvids and clips on youtube. I guess I love them because their story contains those ingredients that I have a penchant for, that is denial, on-and-off and a certain amount of violence. And passion of course. I know, I am weird. But I also love the characters Ste Hay and Brendan Brady. And by that I mean I really really love them! And I love the actors Kieron Richardson and Emmet J. Scanlan. I absolutely adore them! And this is also a great song. Lovely indeed!

Another great video I watch sometimes is actually one with a storyline I haven't seen. The dutch soap Goede Tijden, Slechte Tijden has a regular character called Lucas Sanders (Ferry Doedens) that has had a couple of partners through the years. His first real boyfriend (I think) was called Edwin Bouwhuis (Raynor Arkenbout) and I would really like to watch their storyline but it is really impossible to find! What I shame I have to say because the story seems really amazing.

In the meantime before anyone tells me where I can watch the story (or download it) I have to make do with great fanvids and clips on youtube. This one is my favourite. And if you want to practice your spanish, here you have the chance. I actually think that every fictional gay couple should have a fanvid with Halo by Beyoncé. And there are more than one out there already. Some day I will make a post only Halo-fanvids. I do happen to know what happened to Lucas and Edwin, Ludwin that is, which I have blogged about before. And I also know what happens to Lucas after Edwin, which I have also blogged about. I even do know what happens after that, but that will be another post. If anyone knows how to watch the Lucas and Edwin storyline, or another Lucas storyline, please do tell me!

I will also serve you a very short and rapid fanvid, but yet a lovely one! One of my favourite couples of all time is Cenny, Lenny and Carsten, from the German soap opera Gute Zeiten, Schlechte Zeiten, which also is quite hard to find. But I know how, hehe. Anyways, this is another storyline with a little violence, but it is very beautiful and it has a happy ending for Lenny Cöster (Alexander Becht) and Carsten Reimann (Felix Isenbügel) and if you want to see the really quick version of their storyline you should watch this video.

It is not in chronological order but you will get the essentials of the story. If you, like me, are  Cenny shipper (the new word again) and sometimes get some Lenny and Carsten cravings, this is an excellent remedy. Enjoy!

Stinginess

Some channels and production companies are really stingy! I mean really stingy! I live in Sweden. I have told you before that swedish gay storylines doesn't realle exist right now. I know good english and ok german. But they are talking really fast in german soaps som if I watch it with no subtitles I will miss at least half of the dialogue. I know some phrases in other languages as finnish (ei saa peittää) and spanish (una grande cerveza por favor). But that's all. And I am a faghag. I love gay storylines, especially from soaps. And some channels and production companies are making it really hard for me! Out there, there are lots and lots of generous people who subtitle and upload gay storylines and they are really really appreciated and popular! People in all ages all around the world are watching these storylines on Youtube, Dailymotion, Vimeo etc.

There are some really evil channels, like RTL for example. RTL has got three soap operas with ongoing or previous gay storylines, like Ringos from Unter Uns. But as soon that they learn that anyone, I mean anyone, has uploaded something from their shows, they ensure it will be deleted. And I will tell why that is so stupid!

I have been a faghag for a long time. I loved the soryline of Steven Carrington and Luke Fuller when I was a kid and watched Dynasty on it's rerun on the afternoons on swedish TV4. One day I decided to see if there were any clips with Steven and Luke on Youtube. The short, but cute storyline was on Youtube and I watched it. I decided to see the clips with Jack and Doug from Dawsons Creek as well and Youtube suggested a new clip that looked interesting, and then a new clip, and a new clip... Well you get the point. Then I saw there was a clip called "The sweetest gay love story ever" which I just had to watch! And that was a fanvid of Fer and David from Física o Química. And oh my godd I was in love! In two days I formally plowed as much of the storyline that I found on Dailymotion and Youtube. And I have been a Fervid shipper ever since (I've learned a new word). I found Gaydaytime and rewatched the Fervid storyline from time to time. I watched a lot of fanvids with lots of gay couples from both movies and series and picked up more and more storylines. Actually when I watched some Fervid clips again about a year later I was recommended the Larias storyline and also plowed that in a couple of days.

So I realized I had to see some more storylines. I watched Kish, Chrolli, Chryed etc and got to know quite a few soaps both american, british and german. Before I got my hands of these storylines I had never heard of Alles Was Zählt, Gute Zeiten, Schlechte Zeiten and Hollyoaks. Now I love them all! When I was in Germany in February, of course I had to watch both Alles Was Zählt and Gute Zeiten, Schlechte Zeiten in real time. A couple of weeks ago I realized I can watch Hollyoaks on SVT Play and it really was a haleluja moment!

What I want to say is that all publicity is good publicity even if it's in a faghags forum. The channels are really shooting theirselfs in the foot by reporting, deleting and banning! Isn't it a good thing that people all around the world hear about the soaps and have the chance to watch it? If I would move to Germany I would both watch Alles Was Zählt, Gute Zeiten, Schlechte Zeiten and Unter Uns. That's three shows I would never had heard about if it wasn't for all the fans that are subtitling them. Just look at Salatut Elämät from Finland, where MissFinlandia88 has the permission to subtitle and put out on Youtube the scenes with Lari and Elias. It is massively popular all around the world. So please RTL and all the other channels, stop be so stingy! You will just loose ou on it. This is an honest advice from me to you. You will win more viewers and more respect in that way. Stop making it so hard for us to see Lenny and Carsten, Deniz and Roman, Joscha and Kai and Ringo and Aaron. That is really so cheap of you to try to keep them for your own.

Rewatch

There are some favourite storylines that I can rewatch so many times. Fervid from season 3 I have to watch at least one time a year in whole, but I watch the fovourite clips every now and then. This Christmas I discovered the Cenny, or Lenny and Carsten, a storyline from the German soap Gute Zeiten, Schlechte Zeiten, and I fell in love! I did nothing but watch, live and breath these two boys for the whole Christmas break. There is so much to love! Now I have already rewatched it. I just had to.

Carsten Reimann and Lenny Cöster.

Leonard "Lenny" Cöster were played by Alexander Becht and Carsten Reimann by Felix Isenbügel. The characters Lenny and Carsten met in the army, Lenny were a conscript and Carsten some kind of officer or something. Lenny had a hard time in the army because he was bullied for being gay. At the time he didn't admit for himself that ha was gay, and I am not sure that the writers even had decided him to be, because he had a girlfriend, Emily, that he claimed to be in love with, and he also had a previous storyline where his father thought him to be gay, which Lenny used just to bugger him off. His father was a major homphobe back then.

Lenny and Carsten in the army.

When Lenny was bullied, beaten and even urinated on, Carsten was there to support him. It is so painful to see how Lenny suffers. But he gets to leave the army and starts boxing instead, just to be able to defend himself. And it proves that he has lot's of talent in boxing. One day he gets in a fight in the street and who shows up if not Carsten. He is impressed by Lennys fighting skills and asks him to join his "clique", the gang, that is some kind of fight club. And the gang meet up with other "cliques" and they beat eachother up until they bleed. Very romantic. But then Carsten realizes that Lenny is really cute and there is no return.

Carsten is touching Lenny stealthily.

One day at the beach Carsten is touching Lenny when he thinks Lenny is asleep, and Lenny enjoys it, even though he try not to. And then the ball is rolling. After a fight between Lenny and Carsten and two other guys Lenny and Carsten end up half naked in the bathroom and yet again there is some touching. And this is a really strong and kind of violent scene. I love it!

Felix Isenbügel and Alexander Becht half naked.

After that there is a quite classical scenario for a gay guy in denial. Lenny tries as hard as he can to resist Carsten, and Carsten is suffering badly. These kind of classical stories almost always contains a certain amount of abuse and violence, like pushing and shouting: "I am not gay", you know what I mean. But this story, contains a lot of abuse actually. Lenny and Carsten gets in more than one fight and at last, Lenny even betrays Carsten and asks Carsten to meet him, just to bring the gang to beat him up. But in the last moment he gets in to the fight and tries to stop it. The result is that both Lenny and Carsten ends up in hospital.

Lenny feels remorse.

After that, Carsten believes that it was Lenny who beat him up, and of course he thinks that he is not a suitable boyfriend so he leaves Berlin for Barcelona and poor Lenny goes after him, very wounded, but can't find him. But Carsten returns for a short visit to his granny in hospital, and of course he bumps into Lenny. Tumult occurs, Lenny tries to convince Carsten that he loves him and finally, after a real talk, Carsten forgives Lenny, just like that, and they can finally start their relationship.

A lovely kiss in the street.

But. There is no sun without clouds, and Lenny just accidently threatened a liqour shop owner with a broken bottle and robbed him back when he felt the most shitty (before the Carsten beat-up) and now he has to pay. One year in jail is his punishment and the whole family is devastated. The most annoying thing is that after waiting more than a year for anything real to happen between the guys, it takes less than two months before Lenny leaves for prison. Some kind of an anti-climax. But Carsten stays in the series, moves out and moves in to the Cöster's, becomes Lenny's little sisters love interest (bizarre), and he even nearly dies when a ceiling falls down. Of course we enjoy watching the great character Carsten in GZSZ, but it is just not the same without Lenny. But four months later, Lenny gets furlough for a couple of days and the couple can be reunited.

Lenny and Carsten being cuter than ever.

With longer hair and more optimism Lenny returns for a couple of lovely days with Carsten and his family. A few days after returning to jail he gets to leave prison to serve the rest of his sentence by working in a social project that Carsten arrange for him. Finally, Lenny is out from jail, in freedom, but unfortunately the social project is in Rosenheim, a small whistle-stop in Bavaria, that is in the south of Germany. That is very far from Berlin! Bugger. When we finally gets the Lenny and Carsten reunion they have to move away. Of course Carsten is leaving Berlin with his love. And since then, in august 2010, we haven't really heard from them. Bugger again.

The happy and the long-haired Lenny and Carsten.

I really love love love this storyline. I have realized that the storys that I fall for the most are the ones with lot's of denial and with lots of fighting against the feelings, a certain amount of abuse, and with a an ending. All storys have to have an ending, but some of them, like Christian and Oliver, is harrowing on forever it seems (even though even Chrolli now seems to have come to an end). I can't really explain why I like these sort of storylines, but I do. And this storyline continues everything. GZSZ is told to be a darker soap, with darker colours and settings than Unter Uns, Verbotene Liebe and Alles was zählt. Maybe that's why I like it. And it really seems that every character in GZSZ has some sort of agony.

Another thing that makes me really like the Lenny and Carsten storyline is the acting. Alexander Becht and Felix Isenbügel is really doing a good job with their role interpretations, especially when they are crying. They are really believable when showing emotions, and there are lots of emotions. Just saying.

Alexander Becht.

Felix Isenbügel.

Felix Isenbügel actually said to RTL that he could imagine coming back to GZSZ. But not without Lenny, I am telling you! And now I guess you all think: "Was that a happy ending?". Yes it was. They are rare, but they do exist.

Unzertrennlich

I guess some of you know the song Unzertrennlich with Revolverheld. Most of you DeRo-fans associate it with a beautiful scene on a ping-pong table in episode 300 of Alles was zählt. For me, that song is Cenny, that is Carsten and Lenny från Gute Zeiten, schlechte Zeiten. That song was played in Mauerwerk when Lenny had his last night in freedom before he went to jail. I love the scene where Lenny and Carsten are dancing and making out and the camera is circulating around them. On youtube you can find fanvids and collages with both DeRo, Chrolli and Cenny.

This week I also discovered that the official is very beautiful! Just in my taste. Watch and enjoy!

Also the lyrics are very beautiful:

Unzertrennlich

Bist Du da wo ich auch bin
Bist du angekommen…
Wo die Zeit im Wind verrinnt
Wie Sand am Meer
Wie die Wellen die immer wieder kommen
Es ist eigentlich nicht schwer
Wir haben es uns einfach genommen

Der Augenblick schreibt unsere Geschichte

Wir sind unzertrennlich
Sind unvergaenglich
Wir sind unzertrennlich
In unserer Welt verloren
Wir sind unzertrennlich
Sind unvergaenglich
Die Sekunde eingefroren

Endlich gefunden

Was laengst zusammen gehoert
Eine Welt aus Sekunden
Die uns alleine nur zerstoert
Wie Ebbe und Flut
und Traeume die immer wieder kommen
Sie Machen uns Mut
Wir haben sie uns einfach genommen

Wir…sind…hier
Leben den Moment
Sind…da
Wo die Zeit beginnt

Inseparable

Are you where I am too
Have you arrived
Where the time passes with the wind
Like sand at the sea
Like the waves which come again and again
It's actually not that hard
We simply took it

The moment writes our story

We are inseparable
We are immortal
We are inseparable
Lost in our world
We are inseparable
We are immortal
The seconds frozen

Finally found

What long since belongs together
A world made of seconds
Which destroys only us alone
Like ebb and flow
And dreams that come and again
They bolster us up
We simply took them

We are here
Live for the momemt
We are
Where the time begins

With this I'd like to say: I want more such musicvideos!